Watching paint stripper
I thought I'd better post before Barry and Busty Anonymous started having virtual sex all over my comments section.Oddly, I've been going to strip clubs a bit lately. Those of you who know me well will know that I don't really like strip clubs, but one time was a special celebration.
The others were both in Halifax.
Yes, Halifax, the town that cannot even sustain a cinema has a lapdancing club. So obviously, I popped in one Sunday afternoon to see what it was like. Turns out it's a pretty small little place with two girls working on a Sunday and one customer, which was me.
It was reasonably priced and more or less like just a nice bar. Which is why I ended up going back.
Specifically, on Thursday I went for a 'big night out' in Leeds (ooh, buildings! Lights! People! I was like Country Mouse. I think life in Da Fax is getting to me).
Now one of the drawbacks of living in Halifax is that the last train back from Leeds is at 11.08. Which is why I ended up back in Fax looking for somewhere to go for a drink before my return to Castle Godwig.
Unfortunately this town is made up entirely of teenagers and tracksuits, and the 2 nice bars that I would normally go to were closed, presumably due to an unwillingness to sell primary coloured drinks for the price of a bus fare.
Which is why I ended up going back to the strip bar, it was literally the only place in town I could go without looking like a paedophile.
So apparently there are 4 girls on on Thursday, and they still managed to outnumber customers for the most part. There was a bit of a rush at one point though, which is how at one point there ended up being 4 girls giving dances upstairs whilst about 10 blokes sat around drinking in a strip club with no girls in it at all.
Now that's what I call adult entertainment.
I was quite tempted to have a dangle off the pole and see if I could earn a few bob whilst they were gone, but I was wearing my Thomas the Tank engine pants, so thought better of it.
Instead I stuck around and ended up paying a girl a tenner not to take her clothes off for me, as I really only wanted to chat.
And if you think that's poor value, I say it was worth every penny for the moment when she said, "I danced for Howard from the Halifax adverts once."
Anyway, the upshot is that the strip club is now on my list of ok places to go in Halifax.
There are not yet 5 places on the list.
Oh dear.
Quote of the day: From the cartoon movie The Invincible Iron Man, after a terrorist attack on an archaeological site: "How are the ruins? Any damage?"
Um, well they're still ruined, if that's what you mean.
posted by Peter The Great @ 12:14 PM
6 Comments:
You’re missing a treat in Croydon this weekend, Pete. The Hustler Club has a latex, leather and lube show with “black women wrestling”.
In the meantime, fresh from yesterday’s aerobatic extravaganza over the skies of Brighton (which has turned my head more than usual), I bring you Anon’s maid outfit:
http://www.boutique.co.uk/acatalog/Victorian_Collection.html
The model appears quite busty, so I’m hoping that it will suit.
Anon… I’m building an elaborate fantasy of you “gratifying” yourself with the Rabbit for me in the maid’s outfit. Did you buy the G Pulse, may I ask?
Of course, the rest of the afternoon will be spent browsing “Heavy Handfuls” and working myself into a sexual frenzy that can only be relieved by a trip to the local brothel (now, conveniently, just around the corner) or a violent act of self-abuse. I am a pervert.
Did your ex-husband really go to the country? I hope I speak for the right-minded majority when I say that the Wurzels are f*ckers.
Barry, I love the costume - I'd look so good in it I'm even turning myself on thinking about it. Can I have a black or purple apron though as white isn't really my colour? Re the Rabbit, I've decided to start a little collection of Rabbits - a 'warren' of sorts - which I'd be delighted to show you.
But in the absence of me plus maids outfit and Rabbit on your authentic Victorian dining table, I hope you have a great afternoon.
Yes, my useless ex is existing in the middle of nowhere with some spindly little trollop, who I sincerely hope has given him a hefty dose of the clap. Of course, whether or not he can tell her apart from the undernourished, bug-eyed woodland animals that surround his home is a matter for debate.
You may have noticed that I've changed my moniker slightly as per Mr The Great's excellent suggestion. Does he know who I really am, I wonder??
xxx
Mr The Great does have a suspicion of who Busty Anonymous might be, but I'm certainly not going to spoil the fun by guessing.
It's not your old man, is it?!
More horrors to follow later, after I've reduced 250 students, and myself, to tears.
No Barry, I'm not anyone's old man.
I'm a young woman and I'm all yours xxxxxx
My poor ChildBride innocence and sensibilities are as ruined as the ruins.
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