Have you done your home work?
Well thanks to the tube workers' most recent demands for a gold plated palanquin to ferry them each to and from work every day (or something, I don't know the details), strikes mean that loads of you are working from home today.As a full-time procrastinator working from home every day, I'm here to help you with:
7 top tips for working from home.
- Remember, dress codes are different here. Trousers are entirely optional. Ditto pants/boxer shorts.
- If the chairs at home have a vinyl or leather seat, disregard 'ditto pants/boxert shorts' above. Or if you have flatmates, family at home or picture windows.
- It is vital to send an email to your boss at 9am and another at 5.30pm or later, to reassure her that you are hard at work for the full day. She will, of course, reply to assure you that you haven't outworked her. Neither email needs to contain anything relevant to work. Think of it as Wii tennis with laptops.
- Without your commute, you're going to have to find something else to moan about, first thing in the morning. I recommend the election of Nick Griffin.
- With no colleagues, you're going to have to find someone else to moan to. If you have a cat or dog, talk to them. If not, you're going to end up talking to yourself. Madness follows shortly. But don't worry, we're all mad here.
- Consider background noise when making Important Business Calls. At work, you're a tiger. A go-getter. A no-nonsense professional. Go-getting, no-nonsense, professional tigers do not have Loose Women on in the background.
- Curb those old office habits. Nicking stuff from work today is just counter-productive.
Overall, try to enjoy it for the few days it lasts. That's enough time to feel good about being home during the day and not having to get on the trains, but not enough time to let the personal hygeine go to pot and the mental health deteriorate to the point where you start writing sentences and then trail off before you've e
posted by Peter The Great @ 11:33 AM
3 Comments:
I like the casual feminism of making the boss in your point about laptop register-tennis.
..oh dear, I am in the office and it seems I have already fallen prey to your final point about working from home. The missing word from my previous comment is, of course, 'female'.
Do you remember the Bacons in Viz?
One day, Biffa came home from school and asked Mutha and Fatha for help with his homework, to which Fatha replied, "But Biffa, son, homework's for homos."
'Nuff said.
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