The Archive

Brum and hell raisin'

A fun-packed weekend trip to Birmingham began with a trip to ‘A Formal Affair’ to select the costumes for Beardog’s wedding.

Despite our best efforts to get him to go for the white frock coat, so we could look like Westlife gone horribly to seed, he insisted on something actually tasteful. Shame.

Oh no, that wasn’t the start come to think about it. The real beginning was me and Wig sitting stationary on the M40 having been warned of dire consequences of being late for the Formalwear event and calculating that, in order to get there on time, we needed to average just over 450 mph for the rest of the journey.

But clever Beardog, knowing Wig’s tendencies, had bluffed with the timings so, although we were a bit late, everything was fine. Hurrah!

So after the fitting, a nice pub lunch and an afternoon of Peepshow and Dr Who, we headed out for a ‘big night out’ in Birmingham.

I won’t bore you with all the details, but will tell you that highlights included:

1. An unnamed member of the group forced to ‘chat’ to one of the girls who joined us choosing to open with “Did you know he (points to other unnamed member of group) is a massive racist?”
2. The girl in question being totally unfazed by this comment (which was a lie, incidentally. He’s actually an incredibly cuddly liberal). She was then very excited to find out he was ‘a Scorpio’.
3. The same girl later grabbing poor Ugly JC for a nice slow dance (to Whitesnake?!) whilst keeping her pint in one hand. Class.
4. Our group of mid-30s professionals ‘rocking out’ to Rage Against The Machine in a club. “Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me. But I do have a nice Audi A3 parked outside”).
5. Further fun with Ugly JC in the cab with That Girl when she finally makes her move and goes in for a kiss. Ugly JC immediately tells the cab to stop and runs off into the cold Birmingham night. Must have been a bit of a blow for the poor lass.

So, it was a good night then. Well, not for That Girl, obviously, but you can’t have everything can you?

posted by Peter The Great @ 8:27 AM