The Archive

Cruise control (God I can't believe I used such a corny line)

Shame on Paramount.

Apparently they have ditched movie heartthrob Tom Cruise on the grounds that "His recent conduct has not been acceptable to Paramount,"

Cheeky fuckers.

The film company behind the movie Jackass, in which a man takes a shit in the display unit of a bathroom fittings store.

The film company behind Nacho Libra, a film widely agreed to be both unfunny and a bit racist.

The film company behind the ‘shooting people is a great way to get out of the ghetto’ movie Get Rich or Die Tryin’ featuring 50 ‘my entire act is based on the fact that I was dumb enough to get shot 9 times but lucky enough to survive’ Cent.

They think Tom Cruise’s conduct has been unacceptable.

Now let’s not pretend Tom hasn’t become a character of tremendous comic value to people like me (surpassed only by Mel ‘Self Satirising’ Gibson of late’) , but really, what business is it of any employer what he gets up to in his spare time?

At the end of the day, Tom is paid to act. Or to put it another way, to pretend to be other people. So what does it matter if the ‘real’ Tom is as mad as a Scientologist?

It doesn’t.

So shame on you Paramount. May your movies prove to be tremendous Fosburys.

So there.

PS yes I realize that the behaviour thing is obviously a lie being used by Paramount to either aid or in some way conceal their contract negotiations and that in fact they couldn’t care less what the star did. But even so, shame on them.

posted by Peter The Great @ 3:13 PM