Invasive procedures
I was chatting with a friend the other day about how we really ought to consider invading Belgium, when he came up with a far, far better plan.Quite simply, he believed, we should be invading France.
True, it’s been done before, but bear with me here. The genius of this plan is that everything is already in place and our massed troops arrival will be a total surprise to Monsieur Foreigner.
The plan is thus. We simply send wave after wave of troops to Calais… in white transit vans.
The French, accustomed to such invasions and expecting nothing more than a horde of sunburned skinheads out to stock up on cheap booze and fags, will suspect nothing.
They’ll be part right. Specifically, the horde of sunburned skinheads part. But these skinheads will be the finest fellas our military machine has to offer.
On a prearranged signal (I’m thinking the ‘whoof’ of a sheep being set on fire perhaps), our lads burst out of the vehicles and overpower the hapless French police (who may well be on strike at the time anyway), suppress any rioting that may be going on at the time and bring a bit of British law and order to the place.
Genius.
And the chap who came up with this idea was called Gordon.
So I suppose Gordon is not a moron after all.
posted by Peter The Great @ 2:09 PM
1 Comments:
Mais oui! We are waiting for you English pig with our small yappy dogs and gigantic egos. We shall be dressed as French farmers in camionettes and shall strike you with baguettes and braids of garlic. Although we may come in fancy dress, I don't know.
Madame X
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