The Archive

Not a lotta garota

Not a very active day today. Could this be connected to the fact that I went out looking for 'action' last night?

Maybe.

But did I find any? No.

Actually, the first bar I checked out was getting quite lively when I made my escape. So why did I leave I hear you ask.

Simple. I don't really like rock. And I don't really like live music either. So when it turned out to be live rock night, featuring four bands, I knew I was in trouble.

I tried to drink through it, but it just wasn't happening. The first band seemed to think they were Brazil's answer to Pink Floyd, complete with 'The Wall' style animations on the big screen. Truthfully, they weren't all that bad as musicians, but it was severely not to my taste.

The second band. Well, I have no idea how the second band was, as I'd already buggered off and gone to another bar just down the road for a choppe or two (that's the unpasteurised beer I told you about some posts ago).

By the time 2.30 rolled around I was inches away from deciding to go to Help, a dance club with about a 2 to 1 ratio of women to men, but virtually all of the women are 'working'. Apparently it's still a cool place to go and dance though, and you don't get hassled by the girls in a Nigerian way (sorry to anyone who doesn't know the Nigerian nightclub story).

What put me off though, was that all of the reviews I read seemed to go a little something like this...

"Went to Help. The girls were lovely and offered themselves to you four about 100 real. I didn't really want that sort of thing though, so i just danced and had a fantastic time.

Then I left the club and was immediately robbed of all my money and my watch by a 12-year-old boy with a glock."

So I guess it's in kind of a rough area, so I decided to give it a miss and save my energy for a big last night.

Consequently, a quiet morning was had, with a bit of shopping for a few souvenirs because, let's face it, this being my last stop means my usual 'can't buy anything as I have to cart it all around the world' just doesn't hold water any more.

So, to keep you entertained, a few more interesting observations about Rio.

1. Nobody here puts the handbrake on their cars. This is so the next person parking can nudge or shove your car out of the way and thereby fit in a much smaller space than you might expect. This sounds terrible, but it actually works very well. There's also a 'parking manager' on each block who will roll the cars to make the space and help you park without damaging other vehicles.

2. At night, nobody stops at red lights. They'll slow down, sure, but not stop. I'm told this is to avoid getting robbed at the lights. Frankly, it seems amazing to me that I've not been robbed yet, considering the stories I've heard. Maybe I look as broke as I am.

3. Every few blocks there seems to be a man mending chairs. Mostly they are the same kind of dining room chair with a raffia-ish seat. But why chairs? And why so many of them? Presumably chair breakage is a big problem in Rio, perhaps connected to the bigger arses.

4. The x in Portugese is pronounced 'sh'. So when you see 'Puxe' written on a door, you should say 'Pushe'. It means 'pull'.

5. Apparently they still make old-style beetles and VW campers in Brazil. This means you could buy a brand new old beetle and it would look like a mint classic. Business opportunity anyone?

6. Nobody seems to mind about strapmarks here, so you see loads of women with strapless dresses and obvious tan lines. I think it's horrible. But then, they don't seem to think i'm all that much cop either, so there you go. Different strokes I guess.

That is all. No posting likely tomomorrow unless something really interesting happens tonight as I'll be flying back to reality.

Boo!

posted by Peter The Great @ 4:16 PM