The Archive

They think it's all over

I went to the filming of the popular sports panel quiz comedy show with Flatmate Mark, Flatmate Dean and Very Tall Sian yesterday evening.

This was highly disconcerting as both the flatmates are 6’2” tall and, remarkably, so was Very Tall Sian (can you believe they say I’m not imaginative with the nicknames?). I, on the other hand am what I like to call ‘not freakishly tall’ but standing in this group, I felt like a fucking Oompa Loompa. This also led to a strange realisation that I’m actually taller than I look on the telly.

I arrived early to meet the others and decided to stop off at a pub for a drink. Oh dear. I walked up and down the main road outside BBC TV centre, serenaded by protesting Ethiopians (not sure why they were protesting, which rather suggests they should have developed more informative slogans to chant that ‘BBC, shame on you.’ If it hadn’t been for the Ethiopian flags, I could easily have believed they were moaning about the return of Grant Mitchell to EastEnders.)

Sorry, got off track there. Anyway, I go wandering in search of a pub, but it turns out the BBC is located in a wasteland consisting entirely of building sites and car parks. Eventually, though, I came to another BBC building which seemed to be a combination office/town centre, complete with Starbucks and, hurrah, a bar.

But what a bar. Four quid for a beer! I should have known something was up when I saw that everyone in the place was in their fifties, clad in identical dark, sensible suits and discussing current world politics with an urgency you don’t get in my local Wetherspoons. Still, there was always that chance I’d get spotted and asked to guest anchor the news at ten I suppose.

I didn’t though. I drank my beer alone and left.

Still, I met up with the others and we got to enjoy the show which, remarkably, was much funnier than I expected and actually didn’t have much in the way of repetitive takes or a lunatic at the front of the audience waving at us to laugh hysterically for the ninth time at the same punchline.

Anyway, not a very funny story I realise, reading that back, but I just thought I’d share.

Also, kudos to Flatmate Mark for his performance this weekend. Whilst roaming through the woods after a nice traditional Sunday lunch (pizza), we came across a swing. It was quite a simple affair, a stick of wood you'd hold on to as you ran down an embankment and then subsequently swung out into space.

All good clean fun and, despite being in our mid 30s, clearly something we had to have a go at. So, remember the rules? 1) hang on. 2) run and swing.

Unfortunately, Mark neglected to pay sufficient regard to rule 1, resulting in his falling to earth with an impressive thump and, he claims, the audible crack of his pelvis snapping.

However, despite the pain, he still managed to conjure up a bon mot from his position on the floor. "Oh no," he quipped, "I forgot the basics."

Excellent.

So I propose this as another piece of found philosophy, ready for application in all sorts of life situations. "Don't let go."

You won't regret it.

posted by Peter The Great @ 9:49 AM